I just got back from an incident where LIBERAL SCUM silenced me from using an open mic to workshop my conservative manifesto.
Luckily the incident was caught on a security camera and I am able to transcribe my BRILLIANT DEFENSE. Due to an UNCONSTITUTIONAL PRIOR RESTRAINING ORDER, I am unable to name the assailants that attacked my free speech.
“Ladies and gentlemen, I’m here tonight to read from the first draft of my untitled manifesto. Introduction: ‘The deep state government overreach is everywhere-‘”
Unnamed Employee confronts me
“Miss, you left this microphone unattended, which by common law makes it an OPEN MIC! As I was saying: ‘Your rights as a citizen are being trampled! Take the CUCKS in my neighborhood watch group who want to put away my guns -”
Unnamed Employee interrupts
“No, Miss, I am NOT READY to place my order at this Wendy’s. Can’t you see a MAN in reading his MANifesto!”
Unnamed Employee threatens me
“Why, yes, maybe you can bring your MANager out so we can talk! Sorry for that interruption, folks. Don’t leave yet! How about I read from my chapter about LIBERAL CUCK SNOWFLAKES taking over college campuses: ‘The college campus used to be a place where the greatest minds of WESTERN CIVILIZATION came together -”
WOMANager rudely interrupts
“Excuse me, I was under the impression that I was to be met by a MANager, not a WOMANager. Don’t you agree the latter sounds ridiculous?”.
WOMANager rebuts me
“Sure, call the police!”
“Thank god you’re here, officer. Yes, there has been a disturbance of the RIGHT to PEACEFULLY ASSEMBLE and use my free speech!”
Officer rebuts me
“No, I will NOT go QUIETLY, I plead the FIRST AMENDMENT!”
Officer reads me my Miranda rights
On advice of my public defender I unable to further elaborate, but the arresting officer’s report states he has “never heard such unhinged and fantastical [emphasis mine] rambling in his 20 years on the force”. Maybe he will WAKE UP to his being the enforcement arm of the POLITICAL CORRECTNESS POLICE!